A Football team was on the field during practice, when to their surprise, a big turkey suddenly walked up to the coach and demanded a tryout. "Are you crazy," hollered the coach, "we don’t give tryouts to turkeys." Before he knew it the turkey started dashing towards the football and made a fantastic catch. "That was amazing," exclaimed the coach. "I have never seen anything like that! How much do you want for a year?" "Don’t worry about money," said the turkey, "let me just ask you something, does the season go past thanksgiving?"
Q: What is the difference between a chicken and a turkey? A: Chickens celebrate Thanksgiving!
Q: What is a turkey's favorite dessert? A: Peach gobbler.
Q: What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children? A: If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!
Why did the Pilgrims eat turkey on Thanksgiving? They couldn't get the moose in the oven!
What did the cow wear to the football game? A Jersey.
Q: Why should you never set the turkey next to the desert? A: Because he will gobble, gobble it up!
Why couldnt the teddy bear eat any more thanksgiving dinner? He was already stuffed!
Chuck Norris Killed Medusa with a round house Kick.
What do you call a frog that crosses the road, jumps in a puddle, and crosses the road again? A dirty double-crosser!
One day,little Timmy was at school and heard the word “shit”. He went home and asked his dad for the definition and he promptly told him “coats and jackets”. Timmy went to school the next day and heard the word “fucking”, and for a second time, asked his father what it meant. His father promptly said “cooking”. Then,he returned to school the third day and heard the words “bitches and hoes”. He went home and his father told him it meant “grandpa and grandma”. Later,on Thanksgiving night,his grandparents came over. Timmy answered the door with glee and says: “Hey bitches and hoes! I’ll take your shit to the closet cause dad’s in the kitchen fucking the turkey!"