Joke #1537

What's the best way to force a man to do sit-ups? Put the remote control between his toes.
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has 43.21 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: men

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This french guy he wants to learn English. So one day he goes to an airport to learn "take off". Then he goes to the zoo to learn "zebra". Then he goes to the hospital "baby" So one day he walks up too a hot girl on a beach in a bikini and he said "Take off zebra baby" (take off the bra baby).
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has 51.39 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: men
Two men were talking about their wives. First: "I'm a teacher whenever we are in bed my wife says repeat please." Second: "I'm a driver when we are sexing she thinks I'm in a gas station so she screws my dick and says: 'fill it up super!'"
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has 45.82 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: dirty, men, sex, teacher, work
Yo moma is so fat, and so nasty, when she sat down on the toilet, grown men fall out of her screaming "We're free! We're free!"
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has 51.70 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: dirty, fat, men, Yo mama
Men are like buses. One comes every 15 minutes.
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has 43.40 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: men, sex
Five Important Qualities 1. It's important to have a woman, who helps at home, who cooks from time to time, cleans up and has a job. 2. It's important to have a woman, who can make you laugh. 3. It's important to have a woman, who you can trust and who doesn't lie to you. 4. It's important to have a woman, who is good in bed and who likes to be with you. 5. It's very, very important that these four women do not know each other.
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has 84.90 % from 548 votes. More jokes about: men
What usually happens when a man puts his best foot forward? It ends up in his mouth.
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has 30.41 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: men
There's 3 army generals and the government decides to pay them any way they want measured. First guy says measure from the tip of my toe to the end of my finger. So they do and its 73 inches so they pay him $730,000. The second guy does the same and gets paid $650,000. The third guy goes measure from the tip of my penis to the back of my balls. They say OK drop your pants, so he does and they measure. "You have no balls" they say. "Yes I do," he replies, "they're still in Vietnam.
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has 72.63 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: men
Why are husbands like lawn mowers? They're hard to get started, emit foul odors, and don't work half time.
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has 36.09 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: husband, men, time
Confucius say, man who fart in church sit in own pew.
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has 29.10 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: fart, men
Men are like.....Weather. Nothing can be done to change either one of them.
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has 31.03 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: men, weather