Joke #1619

Men are like.....Government bonds. They take so long to mature.
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Q: What was the first word out of Adam's mouth when he first saw Eve? A: Whoa man! Thus, the word "woman" was created.
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How does a man show he's planning for the future? He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
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If Men Ruled the World... Laws: Lifeguards could remove citizens from beaches for violating the "public ugliness" ordinance. Car rental agencies would rent tanks. Telephones would automatically cut off after 30 seconds of conversation. It would be perfectly legal to steal a sports car as long as you returned it within 24 hours with a full tank of gas. Get Out of Jail Free cards would be considered legal documents.
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What's a man's idea of honesty in a relationship? Telling you his real name.
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What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business? 1) No mind. 2) No business.
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Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One. Men will screw anything.
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A man walks into a clock shop where a beautiful woman is working. He walks to the counter unzips his fly and pulls out his cock. The woman screams "excuse me sir this is a CLOCK SHOP". I know replied the man "I want two hands and a face put on this".
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Why are men like blenders? You need one, but you're not quite sure why.
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Did you hear about the man who got a vasectomy at Sears? Now every time he gets excited, the garage door goes up.
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Men are like... Chocolate Bars. Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.
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