Joke #1749

Q: How can you spot the blind guy in a nudist colony? A: It's not hard.
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has 83.06 % from 384 votes. More jokes about: dirty

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One day Little Timmy caught his mom and dad having sex. Little Timmy asks his dad "Can I join you?" His dad asks "Can your dick touch your ass?" Timmy replies "No." "Then no." Dad replies. Later on he catches his dad looking at porn. Timmy asks "Can I look with you Daddy?" His dad asks again "Can your dick touch your ass?" "No." "Then no." Later that night Little Timmy is eating cookies. His dad walks into the kitchen and asks "Can I have a cookie?" Timmy asks "Can your dick touch your ass?" His dad replies "Yes." "Then go fuck yourself these cookies are mine!"
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has 85.08 % from 1230 votes. More jokes about: dirty
What do dogs and women have in common? They both like 12-inch bones.
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has 55.00 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Two guys are in a bar. "Hey, I've got an idea -- let's play 'Twenty Questions!'" "'Twenty Questions?' How do you play?" "You ask me questions and try to guess what I'm thinking of." "Okay. But you have to write down what you're thinking of so I know you're not cheating." The man agrees, and writes down 'moosecock' on a small piece of paper. "Okay, I got a question. Does it taste good?" "Uhh...I guess so." "Is it moosecock?"
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has 64.21 % from 159 votes. More jokes about: bar, dirty
Q: What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive? A: Her ankles.
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has 71.80 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Q: What's the best part about gardening? A: Getting down and dirty with your hoes.
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has 75.96 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: dirty, work
A man and a woman were on a nude beach when a wasp flew into the woman's vagina. In a rush the guy pulled on his shorts, wrapped a towel around the woman, and ran to the hospital. When they got there the doctor said, "The only way I can think to get the wasp out is to slather some honey on my penis and lure it out." The doctor then offered his services for a mere $50. After a long pause, the couple agreed. The doctor happily slathered on some honey and went in. After a couple of thrusts the husband said, "Hey, what the hell is going on?" The doctor says, "Change of plans I'm going to drown the bastard."
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has 73.80 % from 148 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, doctor, marriage, sex
Charlie marries a virgin. On their wedding night, he's on fire, and wants some dirty fun so he gets naked, jumps into bed, and immediately begins groping her. "Charles, I expect you to be as mannerly in bed as you are at the dinner table." So, Charlie folds his hands on his lap and says, "Is this better?" "Much better!" she replies with a smile. "Okay, then," he says, "now will you please pass the pussy."
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has 79.34 % from 643 votes. More jokes about: dirty, marriage, sex
If you're feeling down, I can feel you up.
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has 69.69 % from 127 votes. More jokes about: dirty, flirt, sex
I told my crush at school, "If you love me, come wearing red tomorrow." The next day she came in wearing black! When she dropped her pen and she bent over to pick it up, I got a look up her skirt at her red thong. Moral of the story: she really loves me underneath it all.
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has 83.05 % from 1162 votes. More jokes about: dirty, love
A teenage girl come home from school and asks her mother, "Is it true what Rita just told me?" "What's that?" asks her mother. "That babies come out of the same place where boys put their penises?" said her daughter. "Yes it is dear!" replies her mother, pleased that the subject had finally come up and that she wouldn't have to explain it to her daughter. "But then, when I have a baby," responded the teenager, "won't it knock my teeth out?"
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has 83.13 % from 967 votes. More jokes about: baby, dirty, school