Q: What's the only thing faster than a black man running away with your TV?
A: His son running away with your VCR.
Vote:
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
I had a mate who was suicidal.
He was really depressed, so I pushed him in front of a steam train.
He was chuffed to bits.
Vote:
Why is Hitler never invited to BBQ's?
He always burns the franks.
Vote:
What's red and crawls up your leg?
A homesick miscarriage.
Vote:
Q: Why did Hitler kill himself?
A: He saw his gas bill.
What do an airport and a illegal abortion have in common?
The Hanger.
Vote:
A Mexican and a nigga are riding in car.
Who's driving?
A cop!
Vote:
After a long labour, a doctor approaches the new mother and says, "Ma'am, I've got some good news, and some bad news. What would you like?"
After quickly thinking it over, she responds, "I'll have the bad news first doctor".
The doctor replies, "We'll, I'm not sure how to put this, and I'm sorry to have to tell you, your child has red hair".
Relieved, a smile spreads across the mother face. "Doctor, if that's the bad news, what's the good news".
The doctor replies, "He's dead".
Vote:
At the doctors office:
Doc: "Unfortunately sir, you have only 1 week to live…"
Man: "Doctor what on earth are you saying?”, clearly chocked, “Tell me what can I do to live at least a little linger, please…"
Doc: "Do you eat fried food?"
Man: "Yes"
Doc: "You must stop!"
Man: "If it’s so that I live more… ill do it"
Doc: "Do you eat fat food?"
Man: "Yes"
Doc: "You must stop!"
Man: "If it’s so that I live more… ok doc"
Doc: "Do you stay up late?"
Man: "Yes"
Doc: "You must stop!"
Man: "If it’s so that I live more… ok"
Doc: "Do you have sex often?"
Man: "Yes!
Doc: "You must stop!"
Man: "If it’s so that I live more… I’ll do that too"
Doc: "Do you smoke?"
Man: "Yes"
Doc: "You must stop!"
Man: "If it’s so that I live more… I will"
Doc: "Do you drink?"
Man: "Yes..."
Doc: "You must stop!"
Man: "OK doctor, but you didn’t tell me, if I do all the things you told me, how longer will I live?"
Doc: "You will still live for a week… but it will seem like a century…"
Vote:
First cannibal: "Come and have dinner in our but tonight."
Second cannibal: "What are you having?"
First cannibal: "Hard-boiled legs."
Vote: