Joke #1863

I'm going to stand outside. So if anyone asks, I am outstanding.
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has 79.56 % from 744 votes. More jokes about: life

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Mohan (to the doctor): "Doctor, can you diagnose my Illness?" Doctor: "Your eyesight seems to be poor." Mohan: "How did you come to that conclusion?" Doctor: "You seemed to have missed noticing the sign, hung outside. This is a veterinary hospital."
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Jenna, Jessica and ariana die. They all go to heaven and GOD says, "You can do whatever you want, just don't step on a pink cloud". The first day, Jenna goes out and comes back with a ugly guy. Jessica and Ariana ask, "what happen?". Jenna says, "I stepped on a pink cloud". The next day, Jessica goes out, she comes back with a ugly guy. Jenna and Ariana ask, "what happen?". Jessica says, "I stepped on a pink cloud". The following day Araina goes out and comes back with a HOTT guy, blue eyes, thin and tall. Jenna and jessica ask, "What happen?" The guy says, "I stepped on a pink cloud".
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Gordan Ramsey:Theres more smoke in this kitchen than snopp dogg tour bus.
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I really do have a soft spot for my MIL. It's out in the garden behind the garage.
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Toilets are like mothers-in-law: the farther away the better.
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What did the 0 say to the 8? Nice belt!
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One attractive young businesswoman to another over lunch: "My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying."
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has 61.40 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: business, life, math, time, women