Joke #1878

Q: How do you get ten fat cows in your basement? A: Hold a tupperware party!
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has 25.67 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal

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What's an octopuses favourite latin saying? Squid pro quo.
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has 60.56 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal
The following short quiz consists of 4 questions and tells whether you are qualified to be a "manager". The questions are not that difficult. 1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Wrong Answer: Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant and close the refrigerator. Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your actions. 3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend except one. Which animal doesn't attend? Correct Answer: The Elephant. The Elephant is in the refrigerator. This tests your memory. OK, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your abilities. 4. There is a river you must cross. But it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it? Correct Answer: You swim across. All the Crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting! This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes. According to Andersen Consulting World wide, around 90% of the professionals they tested got all questions wrong. But many pre-schoolers got several correct answers. Andersen Consulting says this conclusively disproves the theory that most management consultants have the brains of a four-year-old.
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has 83.06 % from 87 votes. More jokes about: age, animal, management, memory, work
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with an elephant? An elephant who never forgets to eat his carrots.
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has 50.70 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal, elephant, food
Does running out of a burning barn make a cow unusual? No, only medium rare.
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
What's black and white and rolls down the Boardwalk? A nigger and a seagull fighting over a French Fry.
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has 50.81 % from 194 votes. More jokes about: animal, black people, food
At a conference on the supernatural, one of the speakers asked, “Who here has ever seen a ghost?” Most of the hands go up. “And how many of you have had some form of interaction with a ghost?” About half the hands stay up. “Okay, now how many of you have had *physical* contact with a ghost?” Three hands stay up; there’s a slight murmur in the crowd. “Gosh, that’s pretty good. Okay, have any of you ever, uh…, been *intimate* with a ghost?” One hand stays up. The speaker blinks. “Gosh, sir, are you telling us that you’ve actually had *sexual* contact with a ghost?” The fellow suddenly blushes and says, “Oh, I’m sorry,… I thought you said goat!”
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has 72.57 % from 214 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, sex
A mouse chanced on a pool of whiskey that was the result of a raid by prohibition-enforcement agents. The mouse had had no previous acquaintance with liquor, but now, being thirsty, it took a sip of the strange fluid, and then retired into its hole to think. After some thought, it returned to the pool, and took a second sip of the whiskey. It then withdrew again to its hole, and thought. Presently, it issued and drew near the pool for the third time. Now, it took a big drink. Nor did it retreat to its hole. Instead, it climbed on a soap box, stood on its hind legs, bristled its whiskers, and squeaked: "Now, bring on your cat!"
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has 29.93 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal
What should you call a bald teddy? Fred bear .
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has 46.20 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you call a mobile homes for rabbits? Wheelburrows.
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has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you get if you cross an eel with a shopper? A slippery customer.
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has 50.70 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal