Joke #2298

What's black and white and green? A frog sitting on a newspaper.
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What did the judge say when the skunk was on trial? Odour in court.
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What dinosaur can't stay out in the rain? Stegosaur-rust.
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Once upon a time in a nice little forest, there lived an orphaned bunny and an orphaned snake. By a surprising coincidence, both were blind from birth. One day, the bunny was hopping through the forest, and the snake was slithering through the forest, when the bunny tripped over the snake and fell down. This, of course, knocked the snake about quite a bit.”Oh, my,” said the bunny, “I’m terribly sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I’ve been blind since birth, so I can’t see where I’m going. In fact, since I’m also an orphan, I don’t even know what I am.” “It’s quite OK,” replied the snake. “Actually, my story is much the same as yours. I, too, have been blind since birth, and also never knew my mother. Tell you what, maybe I could slither all over you, and find out what you are, so at least you’ll have that going for you.” “Oh, that would be wonderful” replied the bunny. So the snake slithered all over the bunny, and said, “Well, you’re covered with soft fur, you have really long ears, your nose twitches, and you have a soft cottony tail. I’d say that you must be a bunny rabbit.” “Oh, thank you! Thank you,” cried the bunny, in obvious excitement. The bunny suggested to the snake, “Maybe I could feel you all over with my paw, and help you the same way that you’ve helped me.” So the bunny felt the snake all over, and remarked, “Well, you’re smooth and slippery, and you have a forked tongue, no backbone, and no balls. I’d say you must be French”
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What's green with red spots? A frog with the chicken pox!
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Yo' Mama is so fat, when she went to KFC, she ordered the bucket of chicken on the roof.
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A turtle is crossing the road when he's mugged by two snails. When the police show up, they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies, "I don't know. It all happened so fast."
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When Chuck Norris wants an egg, he cracks open a chicken.
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Q: Did you hear about the dyslexic, agnostic insomniac? A: He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog.
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You mama is so fat when we went to the beach the whales sang, "We are family."
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What kind of noise annoys an oyster? A noisy noise annoys an oyster. (Try saying that fast!)
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