A tourist was drowning in the sea:
Help! Help! He screams.
Very calm the fisherman says:
Press F1 already and stop screaming.
You’re scaring the fishes away.
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A computer program will always do what you tell it to do, but rarely what you want to do.
Home is where the wifi connects automatically.
Girl: Babe I just gotta a tattoo of a sea shell on my thigh can you hear the ocean?
*Pulls his head to her thigh*
Guy: Nope, But I sure can smell the fish.
A wife send her husband an sms on a cold winter evening: "Windows frozen".
The husband send answer back: "Pour some warm water over them".
Some time later husband receives answer from his wife: "The computer is completely fucked now".
Q: What did Data find when he went into the bathroom stall?
A: Captain's log.
Before his rise to fame, Jaws was Chuck Norris's goldfish.
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Two fish swim into a concrete wall.
One turns to the other and says: "Dam"
Did you hear about the music app that is preloaded on every iPhone 6 plus?
GarageBend.
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Chuck Norris is so powerful that when he goes fishing, the fish are so scared they drown.
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When your hammer is C++, everything begins to look like a thumb.
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