Joke #6772

Q: What did Data find when he went into the bathroom stall? A: Captain's log.
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Q: What do computers and air conditions have in common? A: They're both become useless when you open windows.
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When your hammer is C++, everything begins to look like a thumb.
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Your mama so stupid she bought tickets to Xbox Live.
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There are 2 types of people in the world. Those that can extrapolate from incomplete data
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How many prolog programmers does it take to change a lightbulb? Yes.
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The monitor is up on blocks.
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What's an extroverted IT professional? One who looks at your shoes while he's talking to you, instead of his own.
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How can you tell which one of your friends has the new iPhone 6 plus? Don't worry, they'll let you know.
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A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?" The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field." "You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist. "I do" replies the man. "How did you know?" "Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone." The man below replies, "You must work in management." "I do," replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?" "Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."
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An unfailingly polite lady called to ask for help with a Windows installation that had gone terribly wrong. Customer: "I brought my Windows disks from work to install them on my home computer." Training stresses that we are "not the Software Police," so I let the little act of piracy slide. Tech Support: "Umm-hmm. What happened?" Customer: "As I put each disk in it turns out they weren't initialized." Tech Support: "Do you remember the message exactly, ma'am?" Customer: (proudly) "I wrote it down. 'This is not a Macintosh disk. Would you like to initialize it?'" Tech Support: "Er, what happened next?" Customer: "After they were initialized, all the disks appeared to be blank. And now I brought them back to work, and I can't read them in the A: drive; the PC wants to format them. And this is our only set of Windows disks for the whole office. Did I do something wrong?"
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