Joke #2477

How come you don’t find stupid brunettes anywhere? Because they all painted themselves blond.
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has 25.81 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: blonde

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Two bums are sitting talking. The first one starts bragging, "Today was the best day ever! This morning I found a brand new pack of smokes just sitting on the ground. So you know what I did? I sat and smoked every fucking one of them... had the best day ever." The second bum just laughs, "That's nothing, today I was walking along the rail road tracks and I found this girl laying on the tracks. You know what I did? I fucked her all day long." The other bum interrupts, "Bull! You didn't do it all day long did you?", the other continues, "Well, no but it was for at least a few good hours, best day of my life." The first bums asks, "So did she give you a good blowjob?" The other replies no. "How could you possibly be getting busy with this girl for hours, and she doesn't even give you a blow job?" To which the other replies, "How could she? She didn't have a head!"
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has 20.02 % from 230 votes. More jokes about: black humor, blonde, death, sex
Q: Why do blondes need see through lunch boxes A: So they can tell if they're coming home or going to work.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Q. Did you hear about the blonde lesbian? A. She kept having affairs with men!
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has 32.94 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: blonde, lesbian
A blonde meets up with a friend as she's picking up her car from the mechanic. "Everything ok with your car now?" "Yes, thank goodness," the blonde replies. "Weren't you worried the mechanic might try to rip you off?" "Yeah, but he didn't. I was so relieved when he told me all I needed was blinker fluid!"
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has 79.54 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, mechanic, money
A blonde is driving down the road and she sees a dead rabbit. She stops the car and called out, "Does anybody got any hairspray!?" A man pulls up and gives her a bottle of spray and she sprays it on the dead rabbit and the man stares and says "Why u doing that?" The blonde says "Hairspray is for dead hairs"
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has 21.89 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, death, stupid
Q: Why do blondes always die before help arrives? A: They always forget the "11" in "9-1-1".
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: blonde, phone, stupid
Dustin and Jane (both blonde) were delighted when finally their long wait to adopt a baby had come to an end. The adoption center called and told them they had a wonderful Russian baby boy, and the couple took him without hesitation. On the way home from the adoption center, they stopped by the local college so they each could enroll in night courses. After they filled out the form, the registration clerk inquired, “What ever possessed you to study Russian?” The couple said proudly, “We just adopted a Russian baby and in a year or so he’ll start to talk. We just want to be able to understand him.”
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has 82.53 % from 119 votes. More jokes about: baby, blonde, college, couple
A blonde finds a lamp with a genie inside. He says, "I will grant you three wishes." The blonde says, "For my first wish, I want my love handles to disappear." The genie replies, "Your wish is my command." Suddenly, the blonde exclaims, "Holy sh*t! What did you do with my ears?"
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has 53.58 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Q: Why don't blondes eat pickles? A: They can't get their heads in the jars.
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has 50.70 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Why did the blonde have empty beer cans in her fridge? For people who don't drink.
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has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: blonde