Linux is like a wigwam: no windows, no gates, apache inside...
Which way did the programmer go? He went data way!
Q: What is height of Craziness? A: Getting a blank paper Xeroxed.
Why is the Apple still reporting record profits from iPhone sales? Because iPhone users are just as oblivious to the looming recession as they are to the people around them.
Daddy, why doesn’t this magnet pick up this floppy disk?
You know, I have Google+, Facebook, Twitter, Skype accounts... Man, and do you have life? OMG, No! Could you send me a link?
Programming is like sex. One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
Q: What is 001011010110101010100101010010101015 in binary? A: A major glitch!
Do files get embarrassed when they’re unzipped?
Two geeks are talking over lunch. The first guy says, "You wouldn't believe what happened this morning. A girl rode up to me on her bike, took off all her clothes, and said 'Take whatever you want!' … So I took the bike" The second guy says, "Good choice, her clothes probably wouldn't have fit you."
Jesus enters a command, and the screen comes to life in a vivid display, an angelic chorus pouring from the speakers. Satan is astonished, ‘How did he manage that?’ God replies, ‘You might have lost everything, but Jesus saves.’