Linux is like a wigwam: no windows, no gates, apache inside...
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How do you tell an introverted computer scientist from an extroverted computer scientist?
An extroverted computer scientist looks at your shoes when he talks to you.
Q: 0 is false and 1 is true, right?
A: 1.
Q: How do you fix a broken website?
A: With stick e-tape.
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Dave took Mary out for a romantic dinner where conversation turned to the subject of marriage.
Dave had been saving for an engagement ring, but he was in graduate school and in dire need of a new computer.
Mary was understanding, telling Dave they had the rest of their lives to get engaged, so he should use his savings to buy a computer instead.
During dessert, Dave suddenly reached into his pocket and pulled out an engagement ring.
Mary was stunned, but after she collected herself, she looked up and prompted: "Well, don't you have something to ask me?"
Dave then got down on bended knee.
"Honey," he said, "Will you buy me a new computer?"
"Have you got the address of the butter website?"
"Yes, but don't spread it around."
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Jesus enters a command, and the screen comes to life in a vivid display, an angelic chorus pouring from the speakers.
Satan is astonished, ‘How did he manage that?’
God replies, ‘You might have lost everything, but Jesus saves.’
Why did the Irishman give up internet shopping?
The trolley kept falling off the computer.
Did you hear about the music app that is preloaded on every iPhone 6 plus?
GarageBend.
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Q: What do you call an accountant without a spreadsheet?
A: Lost.
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Q: How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, that's a hardware problem.
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