Two NBA basketball referees were walking through the countryside and they noticed some tracks.
The first said, "Deer tracks?"
"No," replied the second, "Bear tracks."
The conversation ended abruptly when the train hit them.
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Chuck Norris doesn't throw a baseball, it just leaves his hand cowering in fear.
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Yo' Mama is like a heavyweight boxer: a few licks, a few blows, and she's back to her corner.
The way from the cabins to the ring is too long, says the boxer.
No worries, on your way back you will come back with the stretcher...
Michael was watching the derby game between Manchester United and Liverpool;
Old Trafford was packed and there was only one empty seat – next to Michael.
‘Who does that seat belong to?’ asked the person in the next seat.
‘My wife usually sits there.’ Michael replied.
‘But why isn’t she here?’ the neighbor persisted
‘She died.’ Said Michael in a matter-of-fact tone.
‘So why didn’t you give the ticket to one of your friends?’
‘They’ve all gone to the funeral.’ said Michael.
A famous boxer must be operated by appendicitis.
From the operation room the doctor gets out holding himself to the walls with a bruised eye and says:
A can’t do this anymore!
I try to anesthetize him, I count until 9 and he gets up and starts punching me...
If the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the "Jags" and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the "Bucs," what does that make the Tennessee Titans?
Golf is a game in which the slowest people in the world are those in front of you, and the fastest are those behind.
Joe loved golf, but his eyesight had gotten so bad, that he couldn't find his ball once he'd hit it.
He consulted with his wife, and she recommended that Joe bring along her uncle Ted.
Joe said, "But Ted is 80 years old and half senile!"
His wife replied, "Yes, but his eyesight is incredible."
Joe finally agreed and took Ted along.
He teed off and could feel that he had hit it solidly.
He asked Ted, "Do you see it?"
Ted nodded his head and said, "Boy, that was a beautiful shot!"
Joe excitedly asked, "Well, where did it land?!"
Ted said, "Hmmm. I forget."
Why do orphans like playing tennis?
Because it's the only love they get.
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Basketball is the perfect game for a black person.
All you do is run, shoot and steal.
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