Two NBA basketball referees were walking through the countryside and they noticed some tracks.
The first said, "Deer tracks?"
"No," replied the second, "Bear tracks."
The conversation ended abruptly when the train hit them.
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Q: What do you get if you cross a football team with a flower center?
A: Nottingham forest.
Golfer: "You've got to be the worst caddy in the world."
Caddy: "I don't think so sir. That would be too much of a coincidence."
Jamaica has named Usain Bolt its Sportsman of the Year.
In related news, the island has also made Michael Phelps an honorary citizen.
Where's the safest place to be when a bunch of white guys are playing basketball?
Under the Hoop
Two alpinists on a mountain:
One of them falls in a crack, the other jumps at the hole and screams after the other one:
Are you hurt?
Noooooo! He hears.
How come?
I’m still fallinnnnnnn!
Q: How did the pirate become a boxing champion so fast?
A: Nobody was ready to take on his right hook.
Did you ever wonder how the moon got craters?
3 words: Chuck Norris Golf.
Vote:
"Waiter, this vinegar is rather lumpy."
Waiter: "That's because they're pickled onions, sir."
Why did the football coach flood the pitch?
Because he wanted to bring on the sub!
A soccer coach walked into the locker room before a game, looked over to his star player and said: "I'm not supposed to let you play since you failed math, but we need you in there.
So, what I have to do is ask you a math question, and if you get it right, you can play."
The player agreed, and the coach looked into his eyes intently and asks: "Okay, now concentrate hard and tell me the answer to this. What is two plus two?"
The player thought for a moment and then he answered: "I think... no... yes... I’m not sure... what about 4?"
"Did you say 4?" the smiled coach exclaimed, excited that he got it right.
At that, all the other players on the team began screaming: "Come on coach, give him another chance!"