Bill Gates arrives at the port to heaven and hell.
Petrus says: You see Bill, we don't know what to do with you.
You may choose "heaven" or "hell".
Bill peeks in heaven and sees a couple of old boring men sitting around at a table.
Bill takes a look in hell and sees really beautiful women, sex, drugs, rock and roll, and most of all, gambling.
So Bill says : I am a gambling man, I want to go to hell!
Once in hell, Bill is immediately thrown into the fire.
So Bill says : hey, what the hell is this, I saw all the gambling, the women, and sex?
The devil says: 'That was just a demo version."
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After 8 rounds the boxer comes back in his corner, extremely grinded.
The couch says to him:
You should better take a decision!
You want the champion title or the Nobel for peace...
Three babies in the womb discuss what they would like to be when they grow up.
The first one says, "I wanna be a plumber, so I can fix the pipes in here."
The second one says, "I wanna be an electrician, so I can get some lights in here."
The third one says, "I wanna be a boxer."
The others look confused and ask, "Why do you want to be a boxer?"
He proudly replies, "So I can beat the hell out of that rude bald guy who keeps coming in here and spitting on us."
A regular Friday night poker game was still going strong well after midnight when one of the players returned from bathroom with an urgent report.
"Roger, listen," he told the host, "Walter's in the kitchen making love to your wife!"
"OK, that's it, guys," Roger said.
"This is positively the last deal."
Q: What do you get when you combine a Starbucks and Yoga class?
A: I don't know, but there's probably a hipster close by.
Q: What's the worst thing about being lonely?
A: Playing Frisbee.
Do people who run know that we're not food anymore?
Chuck Norris once won the Iditarod by pulling his team of dogs on the sled.
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Chuck Norris once bowled a 300...
Without a ball...
He wasn't even in a bowling ally.
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When I see you, there's a Ruthian blast in my pants.
High five!
Chuck Norris plays racquetball with a waffle iron and a bowling ball.
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