Joke #2834

Don't break anybody's heart - they have only one. Break their bones - they have 206.
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I took my grandma to a fish spa center where the little fish eat your dead skin for only $45. It was way cheaper than having her buried in the cemetery.
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Did you hear about the male prostitute who got leprosy? He did okay until his business fell off.
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How did they know that the driver had dandruff? They found his head and shoulders in the glove box.
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A sadist, a masochist, a murderer, a necrophile, a zoophile and a pyromaniac are all sitting on a bench in a mental institution. "Let's have sex with a cat?" asked the zoophile. "Let's have sex with the cat and then torture it," says the sadist. "Let's have sex with the cat, torture it and then kill it," shouted the murderer. "Let's have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it and then have sex with it again," said the necrophile. "Let's have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it, have sex with it again and then burn it," said the pyromaniac. There was silence, and then the masochist said: "Meow."
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Q: What's a terrorists favorite American football team? A: The New York Jets.
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What do you do if an epileptic falls in your pool? Throw in your laundry.
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Who's the most famous Jewish cook in history? Hitler.
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Q: What do you call a flying Jew? A: Ashes.
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The worst place to have a heart attack is during a gama of cherades. ...Especially if the people you are playing with, are really bad guessers.
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Q: What's the fastest way to a man's heart? A: With a knife.
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