Q: What does Saddam want for Thanksgiving ?
A: Turkey.
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Q: What is the difference between Election day and Thanksgiving day?
A: On Thanksgiving, you get a turkey for the day; on Election day, you get a turkey for four years.
Q: What's a terrorists favorite American football team?
A: The New York Jets.
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Q: "What do you call a Muslim shrink?
A: A terrorpist."
Thanksgiving Day was approaching, and a family had received a Thanksgiving card with a painting of a pilgrim family on its way to church.
Grandma showed the card to her small grandchildren, observing, "The pilgrim children liked to go to church with their mothers and fathers."
"Oh, yeah?" her grandson replied, "So, why is their dad carrying that rifle?"
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Q: Did you hear the joke about an Earthquake and Japanese nuclear reactor?
A: Not cool.
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Why couldnt the teddy bear eat any more thanksgiving dinner?
He was already stuffed!
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A man and his son went into a store.
The kid picked a USA flag and told his dad: "Dad, I want this flag."
The man tells him: "Nah, this looks too bright. Check if it's available in a different color."
Q: Why do Soviet soldiers always miss?
A: They have terrible Marxmanship.
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One night my mother in law came to our home.
In the middle of the night suddenly I was awakened by a horrible sound from WC.
She farted.
I was so angry that shouted and said: "Your food is under your feet and your weapons are complete get out and go to fight with ISIS!"
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I think the best analogy for where we are right now is that America is Elvis Presley - the most beautiful, talented, rebellious nation in the history of Earth.
And now, you're in your Vegas years.
You've squeezed yourself into a white jumpsuit, you're wheezing your way through 'Love Me Tender' and you might be about to pass away bloated on the toilet.
But you're still the King.