Joke #2997

Q: Officer, who provided this description? A: The officer who responded to the scene.
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has 15.98 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: lawyer

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Q: What is the ideal weight of a lawyer? A: About three pounds, including the urn.
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How do you make a group of lawyers to smile for a photo? Just say, "Fees."
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In the High Court: Do you know what you get for false testimony? Yes, they promised me a Mercedes...
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Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo? A: The lawyer charges more.
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A junior partner in a law firm is sent to represent a client accused of murder. After a long trial, the case is won and the client acquitted. The young lawyer telegraphs his firm with the message, ‘Justice prevailed’. The senior partner telegraphs back, ‘Appeal immediately’.
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"You seem to have more than the average share of intelligence for a man of your background," sneered the lawyer at a witness on the stand. "If I wasn't under oath, I'd return the compliment," replied the witness.
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Q: WITH YOUR LIFE? Let me ask you this then officer--do you have a locker room in the police station--a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties? A: Yes sir, we do.
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What’s the difference between a lawyer and a spermatozoid? Only one from 30.000 gets a man.
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Q: Why did God make snakes just before lawyers? A: To practice.
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has 45.58 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: lawyer
A man appears before a judge one day, asking for a divorce. The judge quietly reviews some papers and then says, "Please tell me why you are seeking a divorce." "Because," the man says, "I live in a two-story house." The Judge replies, "What kind of a reason is that! What's the big deal about a two-story house?" The man answers, "Well Judge, one story is...**I have a headache** and the other story is **It's that time of the month!** "
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has 61.63 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: lawyer