Q: How does Mike Tyson differ from Metallica?
A: Metallica leaves a ringing in your ears.
Tyson leaves your ear in a ring.
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Q: What is the difference between Michael Phelps and Adolf Hitler?
A: Michael Phelps can finish a race.
Chuck Norris won the Nascar season, he was driving a bike.
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A true story, according to the LA Times.....
Coach Frank Layden of the Utah Jazz asked forward Jeff Wilkins, "Is your bad play due to ignorance or apathy?"
Wilkins replied, "I don't know and I don't care!"
Why did the football coach go to the bank?
"To get his Quarter back."
Why do golfers wear two pairs of trousers?
In case they get a hole in one!
The wife of a boxer wakes up because of the sounds that come from the dining room.
She wakes her husband up:
Rocky, I think someone wants a particular boxing lesson...
He was a colourful boxer.
Black and blue all over.
Three babies in the womb discuss what they would like to be when they grow up.
The first one says, "I wanna be a plumber, so I can fix the pipes in here."
The second one says, "I wanna be an electrician, so I can get some lights in here."
The third one says, "I wanna be a boxer."
The others look confused and ask, "Why do you want to be a boxer?"
He proudly replies, "So I can beat the hell out of that rude bald guy who keeps coming in here and spitting on us."
A man and wife are at a volleyball game when they notice a very affectionate couple who are running their hands over each other passionately.
‘I don’t know whether to watch them or the game,’ says the man.
‘Watch them!’ says his wife.
‘You already know how to play volleyball.’