In primitive society, when native tribes beat the ground with clubs and yelled, it was called witchcraft. In today’s civilized society, it is called golf.
Golfer: "Well, I have never played this badly before!" Caddy: "I didn't realize you had played before, sir!"
There was an old man named Bill, and one of the things he most enjoyed was playing golf with his old buddy Fred. Bill's wife always commented on how happy he looked after a game. But one day he came home from their weekly game looking terrible and very tired. His wife asked, "What's the matter, Bill? You always seem so happy after golf and you look miserable right now." Bill said, "Well, something terrible happened. Fred had a heart attack on the first hole." "My God, honey!" said the wife, rushing to comfort him. "That must've been terrible!" "It was," he said. "All day long it was: hit the ball, drag Fred to the ball, and then hit it again..."
Yo' mama so fat, people exercise by doing laps 'round her!
Q: Where is the first baseball game in the Bible? A: In the big inning. Eve stole first, Adam stole second. Cain struck out Abel. The Giants and the Angels were rained out.
Golfer: "Well caddy, do you like my game?" Caddy: "Very good, sir! But personally I prefer golf."
Q: What's the difference between a teabag and england? A: The teabag stays in the cup longer!
Why is Cinderella such a bad football player? Because she has a pumpkin for a coach and she ran away from the ball.
The way from the cabins to the ring is too long, says the boxer. No worries, on your way back you will come back with the stretcher...
The stock market really plummeted today, but luckily there is a computer chip that is used to turn off the board if it gets too low. The Cubs have the same chip in there scoreboard.
He was a colourful boxer. Black and blue all over.