Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
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Chuck Norris is the only one that can turn lemonade into lemons.
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Jason Bourne fought Chuck Norris but he can't remember because now he has amnesia.
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Water holds its breath when Chuck Norris is in below the surface.
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Chuck Norris likes his coffee half and half: half coffee grounds, half wood-grain alcohol.
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Chuck Norris won gold for sitting in the crowd at the olympics.
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The first paper money press was invented when Chuck Norris drew a design under his boot and stepped on a tree.
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They say terror?
Look at Chuck.
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If they made a movie of Chuck Norris standing still, it would be rated R for extreme violence.
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In fourth grade, a teacher edited Chuck Norris's essay.
Big mistake.
You don't edit Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris edits you... with his fist.
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Chuck Norris can't have children, because his dick wouldn't fit.
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