If they made a movie of Chuck Norris standing still, it would be rated R for extreme violence.
There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Chuck Norris.
Just the thought of using Chuck Norris in a war is considered a terrible crime against humanity.
Chuck Norris doesn't run out of bullets, bullets run out of Norrises.
Chuck Norris doesn't have a beard on his face. Chuck Norris' beard has a face.
When Chuck Norris breaks the speed limit, no one can put it back together again.
When Chuck Norris got stung by a bee, the Bee had an allergic reaction called Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris can beatbox with a triangle.
Chuck Norris uses flatbed trailers as roller skates.
Chuck Norris scares cows so bad, milk comes out their nose.