What did God say after she made Eve?
"Practice makes perfect."
Similar jokes
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Q: What was the first word out of Adam's mouth when he first saw Eve?
A: Whoa man! Thus, the word "woman" was created.
Vote:
A guy sits down at the bar and orders drink after drink rapidly.
“Is everything okay, pal?”, the bartender asks.
“My wife and I got into a fight and she said she isn’t talking to me for a month!”.
Trying to put a positive spin on things, the bartender says, “Well, maybe that’s kind of a good thing.
You know, a little peace and quiet?”
“Yeah. But today is the last day”.
A guy walked into his friend’s office.
He found his friend sitting at his desk, looking very depressed.
"Hey, what’s up with you?," he asked.
"Oh, its my wife," replied the man sadly. "She’s hired a new secretary for me."
"Well, nothing wrong in that," he said, "Is she blonde or brunette?"
"Neither. He’s bald."
A young woman buys a mirror at an antique shop, and hangs it on her bathroom door.
One evening, while getting undressed, she playfully says, "Mirror, mirror, on my door, make my bustline forty four".
Instantly, there is a brilliant flash of light, and her breasts grow to enormous proportions.
Excitedly, she runs to tell her husband what happened, and in minutes they both return.
This time the husband crosses his fingers and says "Mirror, mirror on the door, make my penis touch the floor!".
Again, there's a bright flash...and his legs fell off.
How is Colonel Sanders like the typical male?
All he's concerned with is legs, breasts, and thighs.
A guy joins a monastery and takes a vow of silence: he’s allowed to say two words every seven years.
After the first seven years, the elders bring him in and ask for his two words.
"Cold floors," he says.
They nod and send him away.
Seven more years pass.
They bring him back in and ask for his two words.
He clears his throats and says, "Bad food."
They nod and send him away. Seven more years pass.
They bring him in for his two words.
"I quit," he says.
"That’s not surprising," the elders say.
"You’ve done nothing but complain since you got here."
Q: Why was the blonde girl's belly button bruised?
A: Because blonde men are dumb too.
A man is talking to God.
"God, how long is a million years?"
God answers, "To me, it's about a minute."
"God, how much is a million dollars?"
"To me, it's a penny."
"God, may I have a penny?"
"Wait a minute."
A nude guy was sunbathing at the beach, a little girl comes to him, he covers his private parts with a newspaper.
The little girl asks, "hats under there?"
So the man answers , "A bird..."
The girl goes away & the man falls asleep. When he wakes up, he finds himself in a hospital & in alot of pain.
A doctor comes up to his bed & asks, 'What happened?'
The man answers, "I don't know. I was at the beach & fell asleep after talking to a little girl."
So the doctor tells this to the Police, and they go to the beach to find any witnesses.
When they got there, they see the little girl the man was talking about.
So they ask her if she did anything to the man...?
She answers, "I din't do anything to the man, but he was sleeping, I played with his bird, After a while, it spat at me, so i broke its neck, burnt its nest, and smashed all its eggs!"
