There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
The Statue of Liberty is alive, but Chuck Norris told her not to move.
R. Lee Ermey's war face is the face he made when he saw Chuck Norris ready to attack.
Shhhhh... Did you hear that? Chuck did.
Chuck Norris doesn't vote. He elects!
The last thing that you see before you die, is Chuck Norris.
Once Chuck Norris rubbed a magical lamp, nothing came out. The genie ain't stupid.
The only time Chuck Norris made a mistake was when he thought he made a mistake
To be roundhouse-kicked by Chuck Norris means getting his autograph.
Giraffes were invented when Chuck Norris laid an uppercut to a horse.
Chuck Norris has 5 bathtubs, they are known as the Great Lakes.