Chuck Norris didn't have a mum or dad, he created himself.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he forced his mum to eat her vegetables!
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Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel.
Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
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All men are born equal.
Chuck Norris was just born more equal than everyone else.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a case for his phone.
The ground is afraid to break it.
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After meeting with Chuck Norris' lawyer the UFC have changed their name from "Ultimate Fighting Championship" to simply "Fighting Championship."
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Chuck Norris once won an underwater breathing contest with a fish.
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Chuck Norris is the only person who can kick someone in the back of the face.
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Chuck Norris can see ultra-violet light.
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Chuck Norris can lie honestly.
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Chuck Norris made the Beatles cross Abbey Road.
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