Chuck Norris Doesn't breakdance. He breaks dance
Chuck Norris doesn't sweat. He forces the air around him to cry and uses it's tears to cool himself.
The Titanic didn't sink by an ice burg, Chuck Norris was doing the back stroke across the Atlantic.
Chuck Norris, Mr T and Arnold Swieznigger died in a plane crash they got to heavens door way and god asked them what there business is. Arnold replied "I want to be your right hand man". Mr T said "I wanna be your left hand man". Chuck Norris said "get the fuck out of my chair".
The world ends on December 21st, 2012. Only because that's when Chuck Norris masters the Falco Punch.
Chuck Norris can beatbox with a triangle.
Chuck Norris and Hitler were sitting in a cafe. Chuck said, "I don't like the juice." Hitler heard him wrong.
Chuck Norris can travel through time by running 88 miles per hour.
If Chuck Norris killed Kenny, he'd stay dead.
When Chuck Norris has a bone to pick, it's always the jawbone.
Mortal Kombat is not difficult enough for Chuck Norris, so he got Immortal Kombat.