Salmon swim upstream because Chuck Norris is downstream.
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Chuck Norris once stared death in the face...
Death pissed his pants.
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Chick Norris has never pooped because nothing scares the shot out of Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris drives a Lamborghini, people assume the Llamborghini is compensating for something.
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Chuck Norris takes a meteor shower.
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Chuck Norris uses black holes to clean his dishes.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he didn't play with Lincoln Logs, he built real houses.
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Chuck norris once ate a rubix cube and pooped it out solved.
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It is convenient to be near a hospital when you are injured.
It is also convenient to insult Chuck Norris while standing in an open grave.
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Elvis Presley, Richard Petty, Budweiser, and Michael Jackson all call Chuck Norris "The King".
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Tornadoes have sirens to warn them when Chuck Norris is coming.
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