What’s sicker than driving over a baby?
Skidding.
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Similar jokes
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Q: How do you know when there is a snowman in your bed?
A: You wake up wet!
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A demon died and was asked by god what he wanted to become in his next life.
The demon said "I wish to become good in my next life. I want to be as pure and white as an angel and also have angel wings... But I still want to drink blood."
So god turned him into a maxi pad.
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There was a vampire who walked into a vampire bar and asked the bartender for a glass of hot water.
The bartender asked what for, because everyone else was drinking blood.
The vampire pulled out a bloody tampon and said "TEA TIME!"
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A man took a poop in a gas station and then realized there was no toilet paper.
There was a hole in the wall and a sign above it that read: "When you go to the bathroom, wipe yourself with your index finger, stick it through this hole and it will be thoroughly cleaned."
The man did exactly what the sign said, but when he stuck his finger through the hole, someone at the other side slapped two bricks together against his finger and because of the pain he stuck his finger in his mouth and started to suck on it.
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Some advice for guys: When the red river's flowin', take the dirt road.
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A fellow always wanted to own a pet skunk, so in the dead of winter, he took his girlfriend with him to go hunting for one.
After a bit of waiting, they bagged a skunk and brought him back to the truck.
The skunk was very scared and very cold, so the guy asks his girlfriend if she can keep the skunk between her legs to keep him warm.
"But what about the smell?" asks his girlfriend.
"Oh, he'll get used to it, just like I did."
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What's grosser than gross?
Two Siamese twins connected at the tongue.
What's even grosser than that?
When one of them throws up.
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A man jumps off a building at the same time that another man pisses.
Which hits the ground first?
The piss, because nobody beats the Wiz!
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Q: Why doesn't Tigger have any friends?
A: He plays with Pooh.
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If I wanted to hear from an a**hole I would fart.
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