Joke #3395

Why couldn't the skunk use her phone? It was out of odor!
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Why was Teddy Roosevelt mean to horses? He was a rough rider!
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Two hunters from Moscow charter a small plane to fly them to Siberia to go bear hunting. On landing, the pilot says, "Remember, this plane can only fly with two hunters, one pilot, and ONE bear." The hunters go out and return with two bears. So the pilot says, "I told you ONE bear!" But the hunters point out that the previous year, on payment of an extra 100 rubles, the pilot had let them put two bears on board. After long discussion centering on the impossibility of the thing and the disgraceful degree of inflation, the pilot takes 200 rubles and with much pushing and shoving the hunters get aboard with the two bears. After struggling into the air and fitfully flying for about two hours, the plane gives up and plummets to the earth in a snowbank. Climbing out from under the snow and the bears, the hunters ask the pilot where he thinks they are. The pilot says, "About the same place where we crashed last year."
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What do you call a rabbit that plays with foxes? A dumb bunny.
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How do you make a milkshake? Give a cow a pogo stick.
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Q: What is it called when a soldier slips into a fox hole? A: Bestiality
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What lives in the ocean, is grouchy and hates neighbours? A hermit crab.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian? He felt funny.
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What do you call a cow who works for a gardener? A lawn moo-er.
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What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? A.A dog is always happy to see you B.A dog only takes a couple of months to train.
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What do spiders like to order at a fast food restaurant? Burgers and flies.
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