What does a man make best for dinner?
Reservations.
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What's the Australian Male's idea of foreplay?
"Brace yourself, Sheila."
How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
ONE......He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.
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Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.
Men are like.....Lawn Mowers.
If you're not pushing one around, then you're riding it.
Why is a man different from a PC?
You only have to tell the PC once.
A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking a round with a fly swatter.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
"Hunting flies," He responded.
"Oh, killing any?" She asked.
"Yep, three males, two females," he replied.
Intrigued, she asked, How can you tell?
He responded, "Three were on a beer can, two were on the phone."
Statistics say that women think they are smarter than men because they can fake orgasms.
Men say "Big deal. We can fake a whole relationship just for a shag."
It’s not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn’t have the balls to do it.
I hear Taylor Swift's ex boyfriends are collabing on a new single called "Maybe You're The Problem".
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