Q: Why did God create Adam before he created eve?
A: Because he didn't want anyone telling him how to make Adam.
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Why do black widow spiders kill their males after mating?
To stop the snoring before it starts.
What did God say after creating man?
I can do better.
How do you know a man is really a bad dancer?
When he can still step on Dolly Parton's toes.
Why are all jokes about women one-liners?
So men can understand them.
How does a man take a bubble bath?
He eats beans for dinner.
A new bride was a bit embarrassed to be known as a honeymooner.
So when she and her husband pulled up to the hotel, she asked him if there was any way that they could make it appear that they had been married a long time.
He responded, "Sure.
You carry the suitcases!"
Doc, says Steve, "I want to be castrated."
"What on Earth for?"
"It's something I've been thinking about for a long time.
If you don't do it, I'll just go to another doctor."
"OK, but it's against my better judgment."
Steve has his operation.
The next day he walks down the hospital corridor very slowly, legs apart, with his drip stand.
Heading toward him is another patient walking exactly the same way.
"Hi there," says Steve, "It looks as if you've just had the same operation as me."
"Yeah," says the patient, "I finally decided I'd like to be circumcised."
Steve's eyes widen in horror, "Oh no! That's the word!"
How is being at a singles bar different from going to the circus?
At the circus the clowns don't talk.
One spelling mistake can destroy your life!
A husband wrote a message to his wife on his official trip and forgot to add 'e' at the end of a word:
"I am having such a wonderful time! Wish you were her..!"