What did God say when he made the first black man?
"Damn, I burnt one."
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Life Lemons Saying:
White Guy: When Life gives you lemons enjoy them with friends.
Black Guy: When Life gives you lemons sell them, buy a gun, point it at life and say "More lemons mother Fucker".
Q: Two men are in a car. One of them is a Mexican while the other is black. Who is driving the car?
A: The cops.
Vote:
Two black men are walking down the street.
They pass a shop that advertises "Be White For a Day! Ninety-nine cents!"
The two guys decide to try it out and they look to see how much money they have.
One guy has a dollar bill, and the other guy has exactly ninety-eight cents.
They decide that the first guy will go in with the dollar, get his change and then give it to the second guy so he can go in.
Problem solved.
The first guy goes in, and after a few minutes, he comes out with white skin, kakhi slacks, a polo, and a golf cap.
They laugh and admire his new race for a minute.
Then the second guy says, "How about that penny?"
The first guy yells, "GET A JOB!"
What do u call a bunch of black buried up to their heads in dirt?
Afro turf.
What happens to black people after they die?
Nigger Mortis.
Vote:
"Hey, today we got the four of clubs.
A guy named Samir al-Aziz, a Ba'ath party bad guy.
And we now have the four of clubs, the five of clubs, the five of spades and the seven of diamonds.
I don't know what game they're playing at the White House, but today, when it was confirmed that we had the four of clubs, Condoleezza Rice had to take off her blouse."
Bill Maher "The Pentagon said this week that the war in Iraq has cost $20 billion so far.
The breakdown is operations: $10 billion; personnel: $6 billion; getting Bush re-elected: priceless."
Bill Maher "The president boasted at the top of his press conference that we have the support now of Britain and Spain for our attack on Iraq.
You know, when you want to make it perfectly clear to the world that you're not an imperialist, the people you want in your corner are Britain and Spain."
Bill Maher "Iraq now says that it will, after all, destroy its missiles.
President Bush said, 'Please, I used to pull the same trick.
There'd be an intervention, I'd make a big show of pouring out the liquor and then there was a case under the floorboards.'" Bill Maher.
Q: What's the difference between jews and boyscouts?
A: Boyscouts come back from their camp.
Q: What did Jesus tell the Mexicans just before he died?
A: Act stupid until I get back.
Vote:
I'm not saying I'm racist at all, but...
I put chocolate milk in back of the fridge.