Joke #831

There was once a ship that wouldn't let chuck norris on board. It is now known as titanic
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Chuck Norris was about to die... until the Grim Reaper phoned in sick.
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Chuck Norris goes on Jeopardy and doesn't answer in the form of a question.
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Chuck Norris's favourite drink is diamond juice, which he squeezes out of raw diamonds with his bare hands.
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Chuck Norris can unscramble eggs.
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Chuck Norris tangled with Wolverine. He beat to him to a bloody pulp, then dared him to heal himself. Wolverine will not be in the next X-Men movie.
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Obama said, "Yes we can." Chuck Norris says, "I already did.".
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Chuck Norris doesn't blink...reality pauses.
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Chuck Norris doesn't ask, "who's your daddy?" Chuck Norris is your daddy.
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Chuck Norris speaks english, french, spanish, italian and portuguese. At the same time in every sentence.
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Chuck Norris was sitting around a campfire with two cowboys. The cowboys were competing to see which one is more hardcore. The first one says," Once, I was charged by an angry bull. I proceeded to jump on its back and kill it by gorging its eyes out." The second says, " Once I was swimming in a river, and an annocanda tried to strangle me. I ripped its head off with my teeth." Chuck norris just smiles and continues tending to the campfire with his penis.
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More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, cowboy, death