Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.
Chuck Norris dropped an apple once, and gravity was born.
Chuck Norris doesn't have an ESC key on his computer, no one ever escapes.
Chuck Norris can use a Shake Weight without looking gay.
Chuck Norris brings the noise AND the funk.
Chuck Norris was once hospitalised, becaused he kicked his own ass.
Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. But nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.
Chuck Norris puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us. The only difference is, then he kills people.
If you type Chuck Norris into Microsoft Word, the little paper-clip just hangs himself.
Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel. Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.