Joke #3909

What happened when the chef got his hand caught in the dishwasher? They both got fired.
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has 49.12 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: sex

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Kamasutra says: If you suck one nipple, the women herself offers the other one. And that was the origin of "buy one get one free"!
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has 66.88 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: business, dirty, money, sex, women
Little Johnny was in class and the teacher said "what we are going to do today class is, I am going to give you a letter and I want someone to raise their hand and if l call on you l want you to give me a word that begins with that letter. So The teacher says "A" and Little Johnny immediately raises his hand but the teacher knows he will say asshole so she calls on Little Mary and she says "apple." "Very good" the teacher replied. "Okay, how about the letter B" Little Johnny once again immediately raises his hand and says "please please pick me" so the teacher thinks for a moment and inside her head knows he'll say bitch or bastard, so she skips over Little Johnny and calls on Little Brad and Little Brad replies "boat." "Very good Brad" the teacher says. "Now how about C" the teacher asks. Immediately Little Johnny's eyes light up and this time says "oh pick me, pick me l know one" the teacher instantly goes right to Little Bobby and he says "car." "That's a good one Bobby." So the teacher does the same thing with the letter D and ignores Little Jonny raising his hand. Now the teacher says "You're all doing a great job class, how about E" this time Little Johnny stands up waving his arms begging for a chance. So the teacher pauses for a solid 10 to 15 seconds and can't think of one bad word that begins with the letter E. So she reluctantly calls on Little Johnny and Little Johnny very nicely and calmly says "Elephant" and before the much-relieved teacher can even exhale, Little Johnny puts both hands up out in front of himself approximately two feet apart and yells out "with a fucking cock this big!
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has 66.90 % from 78 votes. More jokes about: dirty, little Johnny, school, sex, teacher
Two Italian men get on a bus... They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following: "Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time." "You foul-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!" "Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' abouta sexa? I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spella 'Mississippi'."
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has 81.43 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: communication, ethnic, friendship, sex, vulgar
How do you know if your wife wears tights in bed? Her toes curl up when you screw her.
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has 42.33 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: sex
Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
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has 70.72 % from 147 votes. More jokes about: dirty, game, masturbation, sex
Q: What do you call the sweat on your balls after having sex with your cousin? A: Relative humidity.
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Q. What do you call two lesbians with their period? A. Finger painting.
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This 12 year old boy was in bed when he heard his mother moaning. He decided that he'd go see whats wrong with her. When he looked in his mothers room he saw that she was laying on her bed naked and rubbing herself and saying, "I need a man, I need a man." So this quite a few times and then one night he heard his mother again, but this time her moaning sounded different, so he went to go check it out, this time instead of seeing his mother alone, he sees his mother in bed with a man. So the boy runs back to his room, strips all his clothes off, jumps on the bed and starts rubbing himself while saying, "I need a bike, I need a bike!!!"
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has 82.64 % from 2823 votes. More jokes about: age, masturbation, sex
Sex isn’t the answer. Sex is the question. Yes is the answer.
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has 70.15 % from 229 votes. More jokes about: sex
Q: What did dick say to rubber? A: "Cover me I'm going in."
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has 65.19 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, sex