One man said he got his butt whooped by Chuck Norris twice but he lied, because everyone knows you couldn't survive it once.
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Chuck Norris once leaned on the Tower of Pisa...
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Chuck Norris once toboggoned down Mount Everest and then sprinted back up cuz he realized he lost his mitten.
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When Chuck Norris opens a bag of Doritos, it's fucking full!
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The following is a short list of what Chuck Norris cannot do: .
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Chuck Norris built the hospital in which he was born.
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Chuck Norris sent a e-mail through the postal service.
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Chuck Norris is not impressed with your facts...
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Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
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The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris.
The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction.
No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.
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Chuck Norris commited suicide, and lived.
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