Chuck Norris can lie honestly.
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Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over thePacific Ocean.
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Chuck Norris can comment on Facebook posts, before you publish them.
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Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability.
Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse-kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back.
The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming.
They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
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Chuck Norris doesn't look both ways before he crosses the street... he just roundhouses any cars that get too close.
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2 > 1... unless that 1 is Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once appeared on celebrity wipeout.
They had to end the season after he destroyed the sucker punch wall with his chin.
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For fear of Chuck Norris, his shoes tie themselves.
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Some people can ride their bikes with no handle bars.
But chuck norris can ride his handlebars with no bike.
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Chuck Norris is a hunter.
But Chuck Norris does not hunt.
That implies the possibility of failure.
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Chuck Norris eats lightning and shits out thunder.
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