A Chuck Norris-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.
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Rules of fighting:
1) Don't bring a knife to a gun fight.
2) Don't bring a gun to a Chuck Norris fight.
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Chuck Norris once won the Iditarod by pulling his team of dogs on the sled.
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Chuck Norris was sitting around a campfire with two cowboys.
The cowboys were competing to see which one is more hardcore.
The first one says," Once, I was charged by an angry bull. I proceeded to jump on its back and kill it by gorging its eyes out."
The second says, " Once I was swimming in a river, and an annocanda tried to strangle me. I ripped its head off with my teeth."
Chuck norris just smiles and continues tending to the campfire with his penis.
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Chuck Norris can locate the nowhere.
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Chuck Norris invented the spoon because it's too easy to kill someone with a knife or fork.
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Chuck Norris once sued a Law and Order Company because those are the trademark item names of his right and left legs.
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There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris met an exclamation point and punched it in the face.
We now have questions.
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Chuck Norris is the reason why This Little Piggy cried wee wee wee all the way home.
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In 1986 the U.S.S.R. attempted to clone Chuck Norris.
The scientists failure was covered up and we now know their attempt as the Chernobyl disaster.
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