Chuck Norris doesn't do his taxes.....he just sends a blank tax form with his picture on it.
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Santa Clause, The Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy were all real at one time... then they met Chuck.
There can only be 1 living legend.
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Note to self:
Don’t be the cashier to tell Chuck Norris his coupons have expired.
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Chuck Norris doesn't go to therapy, therapy goes to Chuck Norris.
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Cars were invented to have a faster way of fleeing from Chuck Norris.
Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris invented the car accident.
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The only difference between nunchucks and the legs of Chuck Norris is that wood eventually breaks.
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Chuck Norris got swept over Niagara Falls...
He liked it so much, he swam back up and did it again.
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Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books.
The words assemble themselves out of fear.
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It's not the fall that kills you, it's Chuck Norris waiting for you at the bottom.
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Archeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236.
It defined "victim" as "one who has encountered Chuck Norris"
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Chuch Norris stood next to a bear and was told he had to leave because the bear was scared.
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