Chuck Norris is Darth Vaders father.
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Chuck Norris can kill you as many times as he wants to.
He knows CPR.
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Water needs safety arm bands when swimming with Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can Moonwalk on the Sun.
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They wanted to put Chuck Norris's face on Mount Rushmore, but the granite wasn't hard enough for his beard.
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Chuck Norris can fold airplanes into paper.
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Chuck Norris CAN play on broken strings.
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Chuck Norris doesn't m*sturbate, he r*pes his hand.
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Chuck Norris can experience a once in a life time occurrence... twice.
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The boogie man checks his closet at night for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can travel a negative distance.
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