Q: What's the Internet's favorite animal? A: The lynx.
Algorithm. Word used by programmers when they don't want to explain what they did.
You realize that you are dependent of the internet when: You forget in what year you are. You get out from you’re room and you discover that you’re parent moved and you don’t even know when that happened. You dream only of quick connections. You open you’re interphone when you get out from you’re room so you can hear when you get an e-mail.
Every mobile phone user has complained like this: Don't text me while I'm in the middle of texting you, because now I have to change the whole text.
I changed my password to "incorrect". So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say "Your password is incorrect".
Me: Siri, why am I alone? Siri: *opens front facing camera*
What do you call a bent iPhone 6 plus? A dead wringer.
Chuck Norris doesn't go on the Internet, he has every Internet site stored in his memory. He refreshes webpages by blinking.
How do you keep a programmer in the shower all day? Give him a bottle of shampoo which says "lather, rinse, repeat."
A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!