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Why should you never fart in an apple store?
They don't have Windows!
Your Momma is so fat, she takes her picture with Google Earth.
Q: What is height of Craziness?
A: Getting a blank paper Xeroxed.
Where does the acronym LOTUS come from?
Let Only Users Suffer.
99 little bugs in the code,
99 bugs in the code,
1 bug fixed...
Compile again,
100 little bugs in the code.
The MCI virus: Every three minutes it reminds you that you're paying too much for the AT&T virus.
Bill Clinton virus: This virus mutates from region to region and we're not exactly sure what it does.
Bill Clinton virus: Promises to give equal time to all processes: 50% to poor, slow processes; 50% to middle-class processes, and 50% to rich ones.
This virus protests your computer's involvement in other computer's affairs, even though it has been having one of its own for 12 years.
Congressional Virus: Overdraws your computer.
Congressional Virus: The computer locks up, screen splits erratically with a message appearing on each half blaming the other side for the problem.
James Bond got this email from a friend:
CanYouPleaseFixTheSpaceBarOnMyKeyboard?
The code that is the hardest to debug is the code that you know cannot possibly be wrong.
Did you know you can download the whole Tyson-Holyfield fight off the internet?
It doesn’t take much memory – just two Bytes.
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