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Man: Hello, my computer is reporting a fatal error!
Customer Support: Well there's nothing we can do now, you should have called us when it was still critical!
If you messed up your life, you could press "Ctrl, Alt, Delete" and start all over!
To get your daily exercise, just click on "run"!
If you needed a break from life, click on suspend.
Hit "any key" to continue life when ready.
To get even with the neighbors, turn up the sound blaster.
To add/remove someone in your life, click settings and control panel.
To improve your appearance, just adjust the display settings.
If life gets too noisy, turn off the speakers.
When you loose your car keys, click on find.
"Help" with the chores is just a click away.
Auto insurance wouldn't be necessary.
You would use your diskette to recover from a crash.
And, we could click on "SEND NOW" and a Pizza would be on it's way to you.
Chuck Norris is the only person in the world that can actually email a roundhouse kick.
Vote:
Q: What do you call a group of 8 hobbits
A: Hobbyte.
Having been erased, The document you’re seeking Must now be retyped.
Chuck doesn't have e-mail, he has HE-mail.
Vote:
My software never has bugs.
It just develops random features.
Virus "Windows" found: Delete, Repair, Next?
What do Scientists have for snacks?
Micro-chips.
Adam and Eve virus: Takes a couple of bytes out of your Apple.
Airline virus: You're in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore.
Anita Hill virus: Lies dormant for ten years.
Arnold Schwarzenegger virus: Terminates and stays resident. It'll be back.
AT&T virus: Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.