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Chuck Norris can open Microsoft Windows when he needs fresh air.
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What do Scientists have for snacks?
Micro-chips.
The box said "Requires Windows Vista or better".
So I installed LINUX.
How many Microsoft programmers does it take to start the November 5th bonfire?
Zero Microsoft declares darkness to be a new standard.
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Yo momma so FAT, she can't save files bigger than 4 GB.
A man goes inside a pet shop and starts to move around the cages to scout the pets.
He sees a monkey with a price of 5000$ and goes to the merchant to ask for details.
Hey mister, the monkey…what does it know to worth that much money?
Well, it knows Windows 95, 98, 2000, and also knows Word, C++, Visual Basic and last but not least, it knows how to play computer games.
- Good monkey, it's worth the money.
He goes and finds another monkey with a price of 10000$ and again he will ask the merchant.
"What does this monkey know?"
"It knows Linux, Unix, Corel and Autocad."
"Nice, even I don't know those things."
On a last scout run he finds another monkey just sitting there with a price 20000$.
The story repeats, and he goes with a lack of confidence to ask the merchant for details.
"And what does this monkey do for that ridiculous amount of money?"
"I never saw her doing anything, but the other two call her Project Manager!"
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What does the informatics teacher scream when he’s drowning? - F1, F1, F1...
Pentiums melt in your PC, not in your hand.
What do you call a Scottish iPhone?
An AyePhone.
