Joke #5983

A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. "No thanks, I'm traveling light."
Vote:
has 71.15 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: IT

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

The numeric keypad only goes up to six.
Vote:
has 4.44 % from 103 votes. More jokes about: IT
Why is the Apple still reporting record profits from iPhone sales? Because iPhone users are just as oblivious to the looming recession as they are to the people around them.
Vote:
has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: IT, phone
The website you seek Cannot be located, but Countless more exist.
Vote:
has 22.36 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: IT
Every mobile phone user has complained like this: Don't text me while I'm in the middle of texting you, because now I have to change the whole text.
Vote:
has 57.03 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: IT, phone
A tourist was drowning in the sea: Help! Help! He screams. Very calm the fisherman says: Press F1 already and stop screaming. You’re scaring the fishes away.
Vote:
has 20.57 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: fish, IT
Windows: Artificial Intelligence!
Vote:
has 19.53 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: IT
Officer: "I'm arresting you for downloading all of Wikipedia." Man: "No wait! I can explain everything!"
Vote:
has 56.66 % from 102 votes. More jokes about: cop, IT
3 Database SQL walked into a NoSQL bar. A little while later they walked out because they couldn't find a table.
Vote:
has 74.17 % from 88 votes. More jokes about: bar, coding, geek, IT, nerd
One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt. His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor. "Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10." Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks." Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message: "Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better."
Vote:
has 35.28 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: health, IT, medical, money, time
Bill Gates is at the beach when he discovers a bottle, he opens it and a Genie appears. The Genie says, "I have been trapped for 1000 years. As a reward you can make a wish." Gates thinks about it as he carries the bottle back to his beach cottage. Once there, he goes to a bookshelf, pulls out an atlas and turns to a map of the Middle East. This area has seen conflict and suffering for hundreds of years. What I wish for is peace in the Middle East. The Genie replies, "I don't know I can do a lot, but this? Don't you have another wish?" Bill Gates thinks and finally says, OK. The whole world hates Microsoft because we have conquered the software market and because Windows still crashes. I wish you would make everybody love us. The Genie says, "Let me see that map again."
Vote:
has 77.60 % from 159 votes. More jokes about: genie, IT