Joke #4251

He was so poor he didn’t even get a yo-yo for Christmas. His parents could only afford a yo.
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has 34.87 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: money

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Bill Gates once asked Chuck Norris to be his personal body guard for an hour, he couldn't afford it...
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Three friends -- two straight guys and a gay guy -- and their significant others were on a cruise. A tidal wave came up and swamped the ship; they all drowned, and next thing you know, they're standing before St. Peter. First came one of the straight guys and his wife. St. Peter shook his head sadly. "I can't let you in. You loved money too much. You loved it so much, you even married a woman named Penny." Then came the second straight guy. "Sorry, can't let you in, either. You loved food too much. You loved to eat so much, you even married a woman named Candy!" The gay guy turned to his boyfriend and whispered nervously, "It doesn't look good, Dick."
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has 82.21 % from 2154 votes. More jokes about: food, gay, love, marriage, money
A woman was telling her friend , "It was I who made my husband a millionaire." "And what was he before you married him?" asked the friend. The woman replied, "A multi-millionaire".
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has 84.65 % from 489 votes. More jokes about: husband, marriage, money, women
"Dad, your Father's Day gift is another year of not having to pay for my wedding."
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has 67.52 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: Fathers day, kids, money, wedding
What do you get if you cross a sorceress with a millionaire? A very witch person.
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has 43.61 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: money
The patient’s family gathered to hear what the specialists had to say. "Things don’t look good. The only chance is a brain transplant. This is an experimental procedure. It might work, but the bad news is that brains are very expensive, and you will have to pay the costs yourselves." "Well, how much does a brain cost?" asked the relatives. "For a male brain, $500,000. For a female brain, $200,000." Some of the younger male relatives tried to look shocked, but all the men nodded because they thought they understood. A few actually smirked. But the patient’s daughter was unsatisfied and asked, "Why the difference in price between male brains and female brains?" "A standard pricing practice," said the head of the team. "Women’s brains have to be marked down because they have actually been used."
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has 68.38 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: age, family, men, money, women
Why did the farmer feed money to his cow? He wanted rich milk.
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has 61.25 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal, food, money
A woman came home, screeching her car into the driveway, and ran into the house. She slammed the door and shouted excitedly, "Honey, pack your bags. I won the lottery!" The husband said, "Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain stuff?" "Doesn't matter," she said, "Just get out."
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has 69.41 % from 720 votes. More jokes about: car, god, marriage, money, women
Q: Why did two women walk into a saloon pointing bananas at people and shouting: "GIVE US YER LOOT!" A: They were both blonds.
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has 49.36 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: blonde, money, stupid
A lawyer was asked if he likes to become a Jehovah's Witness. He declined, as he hadn't seen the accident, but replied that he would still be interested in taking the case.
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has 71.35 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: communication, lawyer, mean, money, religious