Chuck Norris doesn’t shave; he kicks himself in the face.
The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris is the only person that can make you feel a punch to your face in your groin.
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Chuck Norris can straighten a circle.
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Chuck Norris never wet his bed as a child.
The bed went itself out of fear.
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When Chuck Norris gets angry, forests explode from their own boiling sap.
When Chuck Norris laughs, flowers bloom and butterflies hatch.
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Wolverine has been called indestructible because of his adamantium skeleton... until Chuck Norris broke every bone in his body.
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Chuck Norris caught all the 493 Pokemon...
With the Yellow version.
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Somebody said that Chuck sucks, since then their severed head with many foot marks have been found...
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Chuck Norris recently got himself an iPad.
It turned into iDust when he tried to use it.
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The only reason you woke up this morning is because Chuck Norris allowed you too.
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Darth Vader wears a Chuck Norris mask for Halloween.
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