If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" you will generate zero results. It just doesn't happen.
Chuck Norris can experience a once in a life time occurrence... twice.
Chuck Norris reached level 51 on Oblivion.
Chuck Norris can alphabetize m&m's
Chuck Norris never felt fear, and he never will.
Chuck Norris had his first job as a paperboy. "There were no survivors."
Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, but even Jack couldn't avoid Chuck Norris' round house kick.
Every Chuck Norris joke is a five star joke just because it says Chuck Norris.
Every morning Chuck Norris eats a bowl of nails for Breakfast... without milk.
Chuck Norris can win a game of chess by saying "Yahtzee!"
Chuck Norris does not need deodorant because sweat instantly runs away.