If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" you will generate zero results. It just doesn't happen.
Chuck Norris caught a bullet with the same gun he fired it from.
Finally, they discovered real cause of Bruce Lee's death – extreme exhaustion from fight with Chuck Norris.
When Norris hits the road, he destroys it.
Chuck Norris can eat food while his mouth is closed.
Chuck Norris eats lightning and shits out thunder.
Chuck Norris doesn't make typos. Words simply stutter in his presence.
Jason Bourne is Chuck Norris' daughter...
Chuck Norris eats black holes for breakfast. They taste like chicken.
Chuck Norris doesn't give warnings. He doesn't have to, you should already know.