If Chuck Norris was in a video game it would be called Immortal Kombat.
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Chuck Norris's keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
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The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
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Chuck Norris only created Russians so he can use them to take over TGI Fridays.
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The phrase 'dead ringer' refers to someone who sits behind Chuck Norris in a movie theater and forgets to turn their cell phone off.
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Every time Chuck Norris farts a hurricane forms.
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When Chuck Norris talks, E.F. Hutton listens.
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Death was created after Chuck Norris was born.
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50Cent used to be called DollarBill but Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked him to the face and now he's half the man he used to be.
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Whenever Chuck Norris rolls a 6 sided dice, he always rolls a 7.
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