Q: What's invisible and smells like carrots?
A: Bunny farts!
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Law of Cat Composition
A cat is composed of Matter + Anti-Matter + It Doesn't Matter.
A man moved to a mountain top to get rid of the hustle and be alone.
One day he heard a knock at the door and no one was there but then he looked down and there sat a snail and it said "it is quite cold out here can I come in?"
The man shouted "NO why don't you all understand I want to be alone!" and he kicked the snail down the mountain.
One year later there was a knock at the door and no one was there and then he looked down and there again sat a snail and it said, "What did you do that for?"
What's the difference between a mosquito and a woman?
When you slap a mosquito it stops sucking.
Two bats are hanging upside down on a branch.
One asks the other, "Do you recall your worst day last year?"
The other responds, "Yes, the day I had diarrhea!"
Two lawyers walking through the woods spotted a vicious looking bear.
The first lawyer immediately opened his briefcase, pulled out a pair of sneakers and started putting them on.
The second lawyer looked at him and said, "You're crazy! You'll never be able to outrun that bear!"
"I don't have to," the first lawyer replied. "I only have to outrun you."
Who do you think would win in a fight? Godzilla or King Kong
Neither, Chuck Norris doesn't let his pets fight!
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Q: What do you get if you cross a parrot with a shark?
A: A bird that will talk your ear off!
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Q: What do you call a frog who wants to be a cowboy?
A: Hoppalong Cassidy.
Q: Why is the camel called the ship of the desert?
A: Because it's full of Arab semen.
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