What did the blonde say when someone blew in her bra?
‘Thanks for the refill.’
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Three blondes witness a crime so they go to the police station to identify the suspect.
The police chief shows them the first mug shot.
"That's not him," the first blonde states.
"This man only has one eye."
The chief is stunned.
"He only has one eye because it's a profile shot."
He repeats the procedure for the second blonde.
"That's not him.This man only has one ear," she answers.
He smacks his head.
"It's a profile shot."
He repeats the procedure for the third blonde.
After viewing the photo, she says, "That's not him. This man is wearing contact lenses."
"How do you know that?"
"Well," she says, "he can't wear glasses with only one eye and one ear, now can he?"
Two blondes are on opposite sides of a lake.
One blonde yells to the other, "How do you get to the other side?"
"You are on the other side," the other blonde yells back.
Vote:
A blonde went to an appliance store sale and found a bargain.
"I would like to buy this TV," she told the salesman.
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
She hurried home and dyed her hair, then came back and again told the salesman, "I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
"Darn, he recognized me," she thought.
She went for a complete disguise this time: a brown curly wig, big baggy clothes, and big sunglasses.
Then she waited a few days before she approached the salesman again and said, "I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
Frustrated, she exclaimed, "How do you know I'm a blonde?"
"Because that's a microwave," he replied.
Vote:
Q. What do you call an unmarried blond in a BMW?
A. Divorcee'
Q. What do you do if a blond throws a pin at you?
A. Run...she has a grenade in her mouth.
Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours?
A: Because the can said "concentrate" on it.
As the crowded elevator descended, Mrs. Simpson became too furious with her husband, who was delighted to be pressed against a gorgeous blonde.
As the elevator stopped at the main floor, the blonde suddenly whirled, slapped Mr. Simpson, and said, "That will teach you to pinch!"
Bewildered, Mr. Simpson was halfway to the parking lot with his wife when he choked, "I...I...didn't pinch that girl."
"Of course you didn't" said his wife, consolingly. "I did."
There is legend that goes like this:
In a bar in New York there is a magical mirror If you go up to it and tell it the truth it will grant you a wish If you lie – poof it swallows you up.
A brunette, a blonde and a redhead walk into this bar.
They head straight for the mirror.
The redhead goes first and says “I think I’m the most beautiful woman on Earth” Poof- the mirror swallows her up.
The brunette goes up to the mirror and says “I think I’m the sexiest woman on Earth” Poof – the mirror swallows her up.
Last, the blonde goes up to the mirror says ” I think...” Poof!
Q. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman?
A. Cause you have to hollow out it's head!
A blonde walks into a restaurant to get some dinner, and while she's deciding on what she wants a waitress comes up.
The blonde looks up and notices the waitress's name tag on her shirt.
"Gee, that's nice.
What did you name the other one?"
