Have you seen the offices of the RSPCA? It’s tiny; you couldn’t swing a cat in there.
What's the difference between a mosquito and a woman? When you slap a mosquito it stops sucking.
What do dinosaurs put on their floors? Rep-tiles.
What do you get when you cross an Owl and a Rooster? A cock that stays up all night.
"Pa's being chased by a bull!" "Well, what in tarnation do you want me to do about it?" "Get me some film for my camera."
A man walks by a table in a casino and passes three men and a dog playing cards. ‘That’s a very smart dog,’ says the man. ‘He’s not so clever,’ says one of the players. ‘Every time he gets a good hand, he wags his tail.’
What is the most important use for cowhide? To hold the cow together.
Did you hear about the horse with the negative altitude? He always said "Neigh"
When is a lion not a lion? When he turns into his cage.
What’s a black spot between two white spots? A fly with cotton wool in her ears!